Wednesday, November 2nd, 1983

     At the end of the month, this realm celebrates a holiday called Halloween. I’ve had a chance to read up on this one and it seems to be all about celebrating scary things. Somehow, the people of this realm find themselves in the luxurious position of being able to celebrate scary things because they’re not touched by them. Or perhaps they celebrate them in the hope that they won’t be touched by them?

     The people of this town—with their memories wiped and replaced with the ability to drive and the knowledge of what I do on Thursdays—seem to also know how to celebrate this holiday as well. Pumpkins had crude faces carved into them and set beside every front door. Taking a cue from everyone else, I even carved one. I don’t want to brag and say mine was the best, but some of us are just better at using a knife than others.

     Another tradition is to dress up. I learned about this from Kathryn, who wanted to know what I was planning to be. She let me know that my costumes are usually impressive while we drank coffee at Granny’s on the morning before. I toyed with the idea of using one of my actual queenly gowns but decided against it. Wouldn’t want anyone to think it looked familiar.

     “Are you going to get candy to pass out to the children?” This was clearly Kathryn’s favorite holiday.

      “Why would I do that?”

     “That’s true.” She sipped her coffee and looked appreciatively at a large pumpkin with an elaborate wolf carved into it that sat on a table. Clearly, I wasn’t the only woman skilled with a knife.

     Kathryn put her mug down on the table with a force that almost made her coffee spill out. “But we’re two single adult women. We should go out and have some fun! There’s a party at the Rabbit Hole tomorrow night. We should go!”

     So we did. I went through my closet and discovered that I really did have quite a few costumes. I decided to go as what I guessed was supposed to be a witch. The hat looked funny and the costume itself was really very simple. This realm has no idea what detail is. Kathryn said she was dressed as a shepherdess, but her costume was entirely impractical for herding sheep. She seemed happy with it though, so we went to the bar with all of the other childless adults of Storybrooke.

     The band was playing their music louder than usual, and the crowds of costumed people reminded me of Snow and Charming’s reception that I crashed. Only the dancing was much worse.

     We managed to find a table to sit at. Before we’d even had a chance to sit, a waitress put two drinks in front of us. She motioned to the bar to show us who they were from. Dr. Whale lifted his own glass and winked at us.

     “How can a man who looks that drunk have ordered drinks for us that fast—Kathryn, no! Stop waving at him!”

     But he was already staggering over to us. He greeted over the loud music with his whiskey breath.

     “May I propose a toast to Halloween?” He began. “A holiday I admittedly don’t understand, but is officially my favorite thing about October.” I reluctantly took a drink with them. He wasn’t too drunk to remember our previous encounter and instead focused all of his attention to my giggling friend. “I’m working on a big program and I’m looking for volunteers. Would you be interested in volunteering?” He asked Kathryn’s breasts.

     “Maybe after another one of these.” Kathryn cut through the doctor’s subtext. “Thank you for buying us our drinks.”

     “I didn’t buy them for you. I was just alerted to your presence.” Dr. Whale pointed out into the club. “He did.”

     I followed his finger and went cold. Jefferson was one of my suspects, but it still shocked me to see him here. His costume was the last set of clothes I saw him wear in Wonderland. He was about twenty feet away talking to one of the bartenders. Almost on cue, after the doctor pointed to him, Jefferson’s head turned and looked directly at me.

     “What’s he doing here?” My words came slower out of my mouth than I intended.

     “He owns the Rabbit Hole.” Dr. Whale said.

     I put my drink down.

     Jefferson walked onto the stage where the band was playing and got them to stop. The crowd quieted to hear him speak. 

     “The fire marshal has declared that there is no room! Move down to the exit! We’ll let everyone back in when he gives his okay.”

     The massive crowd moved as one. I got up from my stool and it felt like the floor moved. I wanted to stand still so it could stop, but Kathryn wouldn’t let me. She held my hand and looked back at me once, then looked ahead at the exit and never looked back. A swarm of people moved between us and I lost my grip on her hand. I don’t know why she didn’t seem to notice. Maybe she felt confident we were all going to the same place? Everyone became taller and I shrank down to the floor. My knees had given out, but that face I couldn’t see that rainy night was over me now. Jefferson picked me up and almost carried me in the crowd. But we weren’t going with the crowd out the front door. I think I may have laughed because I didn’t remember seeing a fire marshal anyway.

     I could see we were descending a dark old staircase. My eyes opened quickly and would shut again, as though closed was their normal state and opening them was blinking. Jefferson had his arms around me. His musty hand was on my mouth to keep me from screaming. As if I had the energy to. Down the Rabbit Hole we went.